Selfish

She sat in the passenger seat of my car; I said hi and she responded coldly. I tried to lighten up the mood by joking. She sat there silently. Finally I asked what was wrong and she said "It's all your fault! You're always late." Then she quickly wiped away a tear. That was the last complete sentence she has said for the past 4 hours.
Conclusion: I am a jerk of a sister.

One time my mom told me I can be very selfish at times, only caring about what I have to do and putting everyone else below me. I think she is right.
I have this I-wanna-save-the-world outlook and reputation; I put a tree-hugging bumper sticker on my car; I try to raise awareness of world issues. Yet when it comes to simple stuff like today's case, I am selfish, and I hate myself because of that.

I was almost an hour late again.
I should not have been.
What I was doing during that time wasn't that important.
I made a mistake and regret it.

I remember the numerous times my dad was late in picking me up from school or from English evening classes. I would be the last one waiting an hour after class was over; now I have been condemning my sister to the same fate, but I no longer will. Now, one might think, big deal you had to wait for a while, get over it! But I truly believe that losing trust in someone starts from small, seemingly insignificant instances like these. I honestly no longer rely on my dad. I've lost much of my trust in him. I do not want my sister to lose trust in me; I want to be the big sister she can talk to when she is feeling down, or the one with whom she wants to just hang out. I don't want to be the loathed, evil big sibling who takes advantage of the disadvantages of the younger one.

I'll try my best, starting...now.